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these winter nights & pages i've been turning

12.04.2011

this is what these photos and my nights sound like














nights spent alone in the colder months seem to be more lonely than usual:
i eat my meals with no companion but my laptop, which is a bad habit to get into--
at least i can have a semblance of a conversation with pretty images and words on the interwebs.
maybe one of these nights i'll embrace my alone-ness and simply have my meal
while watching the flicker of a lit candle...except tonight is my last night alone for a few months!

each night i  have turned on my twinkle lights and lit a few candles...trying to make this place feel and look warm, despite our old leaky windows that ceej usually protects me against with his big hugs.
i look at pretty photos of europe covered with winter, and pine forests quiet as snow falls
while i sip my hot spiced milk.

i fall asleep reading. i've decided to revisit steinbeck's pages as i'm trying to brush up a bit
on my twentieth century american literature for a class i'll be taking come january.
i am happy with thoughts of going to class again. reading. discussing. writing. melting.
perhaps next i'll visit mr. eliot, zora,  or ms. morrison...or maybe delve into the ever difficult, but rewarding gertrude. and i finally have an excuse to read some more history books.
i also get to delve into literature i never have before: restoration british literature.
it's a bit intimidating going into a graduate classroom that i know little about its literature, politics, or history. 
but, ah, school. i love it. i'm giddy just thinking of it.

but, i digress...

my nights have been lonely. but somehow they've been pretty.
i love my starry lights, my warm drinks as i turn pages filled with pulsing words and images,
and my music as i fall asleep trying to keep warm alone in a bed too big for this one person.

cj's plane lands tomorrow night...he'll be back at home,
and our home will significantly increase its warmth.

hoping your weekend has been warm and restorative. 


15 comments:

beth said...

small request.....i love your blog but your writing is so small i can hardly read it...any chance of making your font larger for those of us who hate using our readers:)

Ann Marie said...

will do, beth. thanks for the heads up. i didn't realize it was so small ;)

Amy E Thompson said...

I'm loving these images. I'm a sucker for candlelight and shadow.

Anita said...

Lovely thoughts and photos my dear! So glad your sweetheart will be back shortly to keep the winter at bay!

Annesya said...

I do love your blog. your photos talk much better than the word :)

Kylie said...

nothing beats being reunited with your lovey! beautiful pictures

Anonymous said...

I'm happy that you won't be alone after tonight, from one who is alone most nights and has been her entire adult life. Blessings to you both.

Lollipop said...

i love the 1st picture!

Anna said...

I also fall into the laptop-eating trap when alone. Dangerously easy! I've been thinking of reading more Steinbeck, and you have given me inspiration :)

Belinda @ Wild Acre said...

ooh Lawks, be prepared for some serious blood and guts and eyepopping rudeness in your Brit restoration classes!! ha!

Don't like the thought of too much lonesomeness, hoping your classes throw up some friends for companionship when your man is elsewhere. Enjoyable solitary times and lonely feelings are a tricky line to tread?

Leslie said...

your photos are full of warm, rich, light. thank you for that. and for the word, "timshel"...

tinyparticlesoflight said...

Oh, I love that first Steinbeck quote about 'timshel' - so wonderful!

It sounds like your time alone has been spent well - it's always good to have some time alone but I have to admit I don't like being alone in the house at night. ;)

I'm excited for your new chapter of school - I'll live vicariously through you!

xo
cortnie

Jeanie said...

Hello, Ann Marie,

Thanks so much for visiting The Marmelade Gypsy -- it's so nice to meet you!

I find your blog simply lovely, and while I'm commenting on this one post with its beautiful books and candles and thoughts of alone (not unlike those I experienced last week when Rick was away), I'm also captivated by your photos of England. There are two places in Europe that particularly call to me, Paris and England. So this is a homecoming of sort, although this part of the country is new to me.

I'll look forward to visiting again!

Brown Paper Packages said...

My weekend was most warm - too warm - but still i ma able to "cool off" reading your lovely blog. I ADORE the first quote - Timshel - by Steinbeck... words that could appease wars and build so much love.

Being Julia said...

One of my favorite quotes...from one of my favorite authors...and the images complete the whole mood and message...love it...really.
Julia