blue ridge mountains & deep forests

last weekend i walked through appalachia. tuesday night we sang a song about mining. that same night we learned about the horrific business of mining in appalachia. we signed up to help. i've been finding words profound for me. i've been reading things that have made me weep for beauty, that have made me doze off, that have made my mind run all night. i've made a friend that i hope will be a friend for life. my professors are eager for all our success. i talk with ceej, sometimes with joy, sometimes with tears. i walk home after classes and studying when sun is setting, thunder clouds rolling in, and lightning bugs lighting my path. i walk thirty minutes to my little grocery store, making sure to wake early before the heat drenches me. i salute the sun every morning, and bathe with lavendar. my meals are simple, involving no cooking, but they're fresh and whole.

manifesto monday : on breathing, heart, and simplicity

i am overwhelmed...

with joy, with expectations, with passion, with solitude, with the goodness of simplicity.

i often find myself breathing deeply and deliberately with eyes resting shut.

i am taking my classes one word at a time...

reading one word at a time, writing one word at a time.

i've had to break it down.

i am in love with my mostly empty closet here,

in love with my simple bedroom...its walls bare, the furniture plain.

i am swooning over every word of poetry i read aloud...

i must read aloud and slowly and plainly so my heart and mind can comprehend.

i must tell you all how healing this is, i want all of you to experience it.

it is magic.

just re-read wordsworth's "the ruined cottage" and my heart and eyes and lungs

sighed.

magic.

i'm breathing deeply.

my heart both rejoices and aches

{rejoices for beautiful things i am learning, aches for ceej}.

i am overwhelmed.

this i believe.

{photo taken of me by ceej. june 2010}

the tour

it was our little roan inish

.........................................

this sunday afternoon at the beach was a refuge

for ceej and i...so nice to be surrounded by the sea.

i keep thinking of how beautiful it was,

and how i can't wait to be here again with my heart and ceej.

..........................................

it rained tonight. thunder and all.

it wakened my heart-

especially after meeting my professors

{admitted to one professor that i was terrified of his class...he told me this is good}

and a handful of lovely classmates.

i'm in for something nothing less than

life-changing.

..............................................

tomorrow i'll be getting a walking tour

of the city. can't wait.

nothing beats walking to discover a new place.

..............................................

goodnight.

..............................................

manifesto monday : the sea gives and the sea takes

i'm safe in asheville.

had a very rocky landing...literally. our plane about hit the pavement coming through some fog,

but our pilot pulled us out before we hit, and gave it a go one more time.

i've always appreciated second chances...this one is by far my most cherished second chance.

so far i've felt that i will love it here.

so far i've felt lonely here.

so far i've loved the green hills, called "mountains" here.

so far i've been lost.

so far i've found generous people.
so far i miss ceej terribly...more than expected.

it's been give and take.

it's been difficult...

but i'm here to gain "the wisdom of hard experience"

and to find a part of me i never knew even had a heart beat.

this summer is going to be amazing.

this i believe.

{working on getting up the courage to face the humidity with my camera to take a day to photograph my new city to show you how beautiful it is}

{and...i have lovely photos to share with you of cj's and my afternoon at the beach before i came to school}

{thank you for all your well-wishes!}

we passed the fields of gazing grain...

tonight i leave for school in north carolina.

so thankful to all of you for your support and kind words. i'll try to keep up this blog as much as possible while i am in asheville. i'm sure at first i'll be able to keep up, but as the studying and writing takes over i might not be as consistent, and i might not be able to keep up with all of your wonderful blogs...after six weeks things will hopefully be back to normal here.

very excited, taking deep breaths. ready to break open my voice.

a walk to beautiful...and my luxury to cry

i love being a woman.

my heart broke and opened to an even larger sphere when i watched this documentary. i cried, and thought of what a luxury it is to weep, to admit heart break. these women go through so much heart break. i believe their hearts have broken so much that they can feel on a level that i would be lucky to know.

watch the documentary here or here. a wonderful way to spend a friday night.

how to help.

{p.s. the cellos cry in the background...so beautiful}

{p.p.s. my fourth nephew was born early this morning...six weeks early! mom and baby are well. so grateful. so happy to be a woman.}

oh heavenly day...

.as i dropped ceej off at the airport this morning i felt deeply how lucky i am.

.i still believe that in heaven i'll be riding a white horse through a beautiful meadow.

.i'm going to work all my life doing the incredibly difficult things that i deeply love.

.am in love with calling dear friends with good hearts who know.

.my library is growing healthy. and hopefully so is my brain.

.four years ago i dreamed about going to north carolina. i'm going there tomorrow.

.i've always feared being a poet...next week i begin to face my fears.

.my biggest fears are my biggest joys.

.idealism is difficult, but worthwhile.

.i wonder if my mom knows that she is a poet from another realm.

.ceej brought me roses that brought me courage.

.i will always be a girl with dreams.

.i am in love with an honest heart.

.life is so clear when i am vulnerable...i see how good it is to fail, to be wrong, to learn.

.i still love the song of a violin.

.i am shaking with possibility. it is all so very vast indeed.

.i am breathing the ebb and flow of life deeply.

though i love my little sewing machine, it had a rough time dealing with such a stiff fabric...resulting in some impromtu stitching by hand

i wanted to make a cute tote bag like this one.

i very quickly learned that my little amateur machine

wasn't ready for stiff upholstery fabric.

it hiccuped, stalled, got cranky, and refused to sew.

but first, i'll back up a bit.

i have been loving gray lately.

but i didn't want to be too depressing so

i thought i'd add a solitary solid yellow stripe...

maybe adding yellow handles,

and definitely a yellow inner pocket.

i was trying to be oh so exact with my measuring...something i usually speed through.

i even used straight-pins...another rare event. i usally like to eye things a little too much.

but i'm getting better...i even pressed the seams open, nice and flat!

the yellow pocket!

and my attempt to sew it all together by hand with pretty aqua thread.

but that wasn't going so well either.

so this project is on hold until i return from school at the end of july.

when i finish it, i will have a wonderfully sturdy beach tote

that will probably spend more time carrying books rather

than carrying towels, beach balls, or buckets.

on my desktop:

i've been doing a bit of spring cleaning on my lil' outdated laptop.

as i was cleaning i erased forever the photo i used to have on my laptop...

which brought a blink-of-an-eye moment of "oh no!"

but then i quickly thought of something better to gaze at on my laptop:

a collage of some of my favorite images that i've snapped within the past six months.

these past couple of days of been crazy crazy busy busy.

i'm running around making sure that ceej and i have everything we need

as we travel constantly for the next 2-3 months.

i'm learning that sometimes i don't always have the best plans...

next time i'll do better of course having learned my lesson.

we'll see what else proves to not work so hot,

and we'll see where we were smart.

can't believe i'm only two days away from north carolina and a summer of poetry and writing.

.nervous.excited.

trying not to miss ceej before he even leaves and i leave the next day.

if you're interested in the images, you can see the original blog posts with more like images below. images from left to right, top to bottom:

1. the life and colors of peonies

2. antique book: death and resurrection

3. the sea

4. plants to keep me company

5. where the soul never dies

6. my beloved piano

7. a day of knitting and writing

8. pretty thread

9. weekend blossoms

10. roses sweet

11. the foggy river

12. heartful ranunculus

13. calligraphy love

14. cherries, cherries, cherries!

15. i love orchards almost more than anything.

16. my knitting addiction

17. the prettiest gift ever given

18. blossoms in the city

19. wonderful winter in march

20. if you love magnolias...

21. pretty flowers in mason jars

22. couldn't find where i posted the original, so here's a fun post

23. some more peonies

24. this is how much i love tea

25. things i make

i left my heart in...portland, specifically, i left it at mio gelato

five summers ago ceej and i spent a summer in portland, oregon

while ceej did a design internship during his college days.

we fell madly, deeply in love with this city.

i loved walking around all day everyday exploring every inch of

this very vibrant and creative city.

most of all, we fell in love with the gelato.

best.gelato.in.the.u.s.of.a.

we stopped by to say hello to our little neighborhood

as we drove down i-5 last week.

it made me a little "home"sick to see the old sites

as well as so many new great things coming up in that city.

hoping that someday our path will take us again to portland.

have you ever been?

don't you just love it?

port townsend : picture extravaganza

last week, while visiting family in washington,

we spent an afternoon walking around port townsend.

oh how i loved this little place!

loved seeing all the character in the buildings,

and the little ships that would sail by.

we had lunch at this wonderful little pizza place.

i hadn't had this kind of pizza in a while...mmmmm.

worth the wait for sure.

while waiting the kids read books, and colored.

then the pizza finally made it!

i shared a veggie pizza with the kids...their half was cheese seeing that they didn't much care for veggies that day.









one of my very favorite things is to see ceej

playing with our nieces and nephews...

he really knows how to play.






my little nephew is obsessed with sticks and water.

he is never happier than when he can throw sticks into the water.

we got hit with a big downpoor of rain when we headed for the beach...

but luckily it stopped for about an hour so we could get out of the car

and explore a bit.